Emotional-diarrhea

im sad im sad im sad im sad im sad but why? am i not worthy of reciprocity?

an eclipse consumed my body, when I nearly succumbed to silent suffocation God brought me light in your form two questions puzzled my mind Was I dying... or only just coming alive? I love you because you taught me - you, don't complete me, I, complete me. you taught me I was strong enough to stitch the gaping holes torn through my self-respect my pride my dignity my happiness you believed in my strength you didn't need me to be your 'damsel in distress' you loved me un-broken -back to being my own s-h-e-ro I love you because sometimes, I'm too much sometimes, I feel too little ; because at times Tuesday's blue is not the same blue to me, on Wednesday and sometimes I let the demons eat my lemon meringue - a substitute cause it takes time to learn how to perfect lemonade

I'm quite sad today. I'm sad most days. All I really long for is true companionship every step of the way. While that's not a practical desire and I know I can do without it - its a desire nonetheless... I don't consider myself a clingy person...At least I hope I am not. I would never want to burden someone like that, suffocating them. I just wish I was longed for, as I long for him. I wish he reciprocated that longing in some way sometimes. I know he has a lot going on and it's unfair for me to wish he was here all the time, but, I can't help but miss him. My heart feels raw missing him. It makes wishful for the future... I'm hopeful I'll see more of him InshaAllah, when we live together inshaAllah.. I really value spending time with him... A few hours with him instantly make me happy. He makes me happy. I guess that's why I want to see more often... He often asks me why I keep getting him things, or writing him long verses. He seems overwhelmed wh...

I had an epiphany today. As I was on my way to my driving trial I realised - nothing really matters. That exam you were worried about, the trip you were planning for months, that person you wanted to like you, that promotion that you thought you needed. Nothing truly matters if you think about it. If you really put life into perspective, the 'goals' we kill ourselves for are not set in stone. In fact, they're far from it. The 'goals' we seek so desperately, are the standards other people set for us. Man-made milestones in a world that is anything but man-made. We get so consumed by these 'milestones' we actually start believing we have complete control over the circumstances within our lives. I mean how arrogant and short-sighted is that frame of mind? Maybe, if we focused on today and did the best we could, we'd have a lot less heart-ache, a lot less stress, a lot less disappointment. Today, I went into my trial and with no attachments. Passing or fa...